Thursday 31 May 2012

Kelly Brook on a bicycle

Look how amazing Kelly Brook looks! I wouldn't have recognised her unless I'd read her name.
Of course when I put on a checked shirt I look like a lesbian, but Kelly looks super chic here.
Seat is still a bit high, but it's much better than this:
Same bike, a lot less class.
Note: a strategically placed safety pin makes a world of difference when it comes to cycling in a floaty dress.
Wait until you're sitting on your bike, then pin your dress so it resembles a pair of shorts.
And put your seat up!

Saturday 26 May 2012

Fixing a puncture

Caprice got a puncture!
It was a lot less dramatic than I had imagined. I thought that suddenly your wheel practically collapsed on you and you'd have walk ten miles pushing your bike to the nearest bus stop. Instead I realised it felt a bit squishier than normal when I got to the Boy's house and asked him. He confirmed that yes, I had a puncture. He pumped it up and I still managed to ride the seven hilly miles back from Bridgend though, so clearly, not that big a deal.
Apparently I couldn't just pump it up and go every time I wanted to ride though, as that makes punctures worse. Or something. I didn't want a gaping hole in Caprice, so I figured it was something that I really ought to get fixed.
Plus, the Olympic torch is passing about four miles from here, too far to comfortably walk and the money for the bus is about three times the price of a puncture kit. My dad couldn't give me a lift because all the roads would be blocked off, and there'd be no parking anywhere.
A bike is really the only sensible option in that sort of situation.
I told my dad I had a puncture.
His response was "Oh dear. It's okay, your brother will fix it for you."
My mum's response was "Better have a chat with your brother then."
I was suddenly struck by just how many people expected me to make my brother do it for me. And to be fair, I do have quite a history of doing that.
When given a choice between hoisting a very weighty Caprice onto a train and fiddling with the straps in the bike carriage, or wearing a low cut top and smiling at a man who'll volunteer to do it for me, I'll always choose the latter. It's just good sense, I thought, a win-win situation.
One time I was on a crowded carriage of a train, and there was another girl with a bike there. I had a dutch style bicycle with a basket, was wearing a short skirt and showing my cleavage, and smiled a lot. The other girl had a mountain bike, and a helmet on, and clothes that were definitely there to be practical and not to look good. But we were both girls with bikes. And guess which one had a carriage of men asking her if she wanted help, who offered to carry her bike off for her. And guess who said "yes".
But I'm not sure I want to be that girl anymore. Feminism happened. Girls can fix bikes now. Even girls who match their nail polish to their shoes.
So an hour or so ago, I bought a puncture repair kit, and I found a pump in the attic, and I looked up videos on Youtube which were all made for people with derailleur gears instead of hubs, and who had quick release wheels, neither of which I had.
And it took a while, and I got the carpet soaking wet checking for bubbles in a bucket of water, but I found the puncture, and I patched it up, and hopefully it's going to be fine.
Otherwise I'll just get my brother to look at it, I guess ;)

Tuesday 15 May 2012

Using Sturmey Archer Gears!


When I first got my glorious Caprice, I was very concerned.
I was out of breath just nipping around the block, then I went on a ride down the sea front and had to get off and push on what I felt was a bit of a minor hill.
How on Earth was I going to ever get up that enormous hill going out of my town? I wouldn’t be able to even manage the flat bits afterwards without sweating like a rider in the Tour de France.
I didn’t really think about the gears. I tried to change into second, but failed and just figured maybe you weren’t supposed to change gears then. Maybe it was an automatic?
I didn’t know, but I wasn’t feeling optimistic about using Caprice for getting to and from the station.
Fast forward to three in the morning, whilst I’m asleep, resting my exhausted legs, and my phone rings.
It’s the Boy, drunk, who has just got back from a night out and wants to know how my ride went. I tell him my hill and gear problems, and my fear that I’ll never make it to the station, that it was all useless.
“There’sh thesh gears, schturmmey something, and you have to pedal backwardsh for them to work” he slurred.
“Sturmey Archer? That’s what I’ve got. I have to pedal backwards?”
“Yeshh”
“That might be my problem.”
“No, itsh that you’re a schilly!”
So there’s that. Thanks to pedalling backwards I am no longer pedalling up hills in the highest gear. And no longer getting off and walking! (Except the massive hill outside my town, but baby steps!)
I made it to Bridgend, and back, by the way. My next challenge is all the way to Cardiff! I may catch the train at stations closer and closer until I’m going the whole way.

Saturday 5 May 2012

Vintage Raleigh Caprice


I have a bicycle.
I HAVE A BICYCLE.
I am so excited. It arrived yesterday, from E-bay, and I couldn’t wait to stick it all together and try it out. Or at least, get my brother to stick it all together, because I have no idea how these things work, and he allegedly does.
It was getting dark by the time it was actually rideable, so I just went up and down my road. I felt like I was stood at the from of the Titanic with Leonardo DiCaprio’s arms around me, my red hair streaming in the wind.
She’s a ‘vintage’ (dunno how old) Raleigh Caprice, with a lovely loop frame and a basket. I have many aesthetic improvements I want to make on her, the most major being to paint her a light pastel blue. I’m going to get a scarf in a matching colour and we’ll look like quite the delightful pair, whooshing along down lanes and coastal paths. 
She (she is clearly a 'she', she has a basket!) has three gears, one of which definitely works - I've only ridden her on the flat so haven't tried out the other two gears.
This is the modern version that Raleigh are pumping out:

With the exception of the saddle and handlebars and basket: hideous. Look at that frame! What were they thinking?
My 'vintage' version is so much more elegant. It looks a little like this one:

Where did they go wrong?!
 
Today I rode down to the field and back on her. It was hard work pedalling against the wind, but I think this is a good thing considering how lazy and chubby I’ve been getting in the last six months. I'm not sure how well I'll cope with cycling to Bridgend though, I think it'll be a nightmare! I was out of breath just going around the block, but hopefully my fitness will improve and I'll be able to go actual distances.
I’m going to take her for a proper ride later, as soon as I get some lights and a lock from the bike shop around the corner.

Tuesday 1 May 2012

Am I a hipster?


I’ve decided to get a loop frame bicycle. According to the BF this makes me a hipster.
Really?
According to him:
Girl hipster bikes are the dutch-style loop framed bikes, like Pashleys. They’re the sort of bike Zooey Deschannel would have, if she cycled.
Guy hipster bikes are fixed speed ones, that they use for racing on the tracks, with no brakes. I had never heard of this kind of bicycle before, and they sound petrifying. Hipsters ride scary bikes? Who knew?
And if a girl REALLY wants to be a hipster, she could ride a fixed gear.
But I don’t quite understand this. What if you’re just a girl who wants to ride her bike in normal clothes, like dresses? And likes old things?
Plus, apparently dutch bikes are getting super popular lately. If I were a hipster, surely I would be really glum about this, because it would mean I’m not as special as I’d like to be, instead of rejoicing at the fact that it makes them easier to attain?
I can’t be a hipster, I like Taylor Swift too much.